Toxic
06-18-2008, 01:09 PM
A Woman's Little Instruction Book
- If you think the way to a man's heart is through his stomach you're aiming too high.
- Women don't make fools of men -- most of them are the do-it-yourself types.
- The best reason to divorce a man is a health reason: you're sick of him.
- Never trust a man who says he's the boss at home. He probably lies about other things too.
- A woman's work that is never done is the stuff she asked her husband to do.
- If you want a nice man go for a bald one -- they try harder.
- Go for younger men. You might as well -- they never mature anyway.
- A man who can dress himself without looking like Forrest Gump is unquestionably gay.
- Men are all the same -- they just have different faces so you can tell them apart.
- Whenever you meet a man who would make a good husband, you will usually find that he does.
- Scientists have just discovered something that can do the work of five men -- a woman.
- There are a lot of words you can use to describe men -- strong, caring, loving -- they'd be wrong but you can still use them.
- Men's brains are like the prison system -- not enough cells per man.
- There are only two four letter words that are offensive to men - "don't" and "stop" (unless they're used together).
- Husbands are like children -- they're fine if they're someone else's.
- If a man appears sexy, caring and smart give him a day and he will be back to his usual self.
- If your man appears happy, excited and keeps looking at you all of a sudden he is probably checking out the women behind you.
- Figuring out men is like trying to make a jigsaw puzzle in a car, once you think you have it all put together, you find another piece but you don't know where it goes.
- If you think the way to a man's heart is through his stomach you're aiming too high.
- Women don't make fools of men -- most of them are the do-it-yourself types.
- The best reason to divorce a man is a health reason: you're sick of him.
- Never trust a man who says he's the boss at home. He probably lies about other things too.
- A woman's work that is never done is the stuff she asked her husband to do.
- If you want a nice man go for a bald one -- they try harder.
- Go for younger men. You might as well -- they never mature anyway.
- A man who can dress himself without looking like Forrest Gump is unquestionably gay.
- Men are all the same -- they just have different faces so you can tell them apart.
- Whenever you meet a man who would make a good husband, you will usually find that he does.
- Scientists have just discovered something that can do the work of five men -- a woman.
- There are a lot of words you can use to describe men -- strong, caring, loving -- they'd be wrong but you can still use them.
- Men's brains are like the prison system -- not enough cells per man.
- There are only two four letter words that are offensive to men - "don't" and "stop" (unless they're used together).
- Husbands are like children -- they're fine if they're someone else's.
- If a man appears sexy, caring and smart give him a day and he will be back to his usual self.
- If your man appears happy, excited and keeps looking at you all of a sudden he is probably checking out the women behind you.
- Figuring out men is like trying to make a jigsaw puzzle in a car, once you think you have it all put together, you find another piece but you don't know where it goes.